CryptoNews

I was watching the science channel one day. It was an explanation of why no one has actually found a bigfoot. Not live nor dead nor even old bones. He had it all figured out. The man was billed as a crypto-biologist. Now that gave me pause for thought. 

Then I realized, a crypto-biologist studies animals that don't exist. I'm sure this man had a crypto-doctorate in biology from an Ivy League crypto-university. I wonder, how does one dissect a crypto-critter for crypto-anatomy classes. Very confusing.

I thought some more and realized that this crypto thing must be catching on. We now live in an age of crypto-journalism. We are being presented with non-existent news. The press, not people to pass up on a good thing, seem to have decided rumor and innuendo are as good as solid investigation and multiple corroborative sources. 

Of course, we have Brian Williams. He seems to be the king of crypto-journalists with his own exciting stories from his own exciting life that never happened. I'm glad he recovered from those non-injuries sustained in that non-existent crash.

Then we have the famous "hands up, don't shoot" crypto-stories that caused real riots, looting, and violence.  That was a truly proud moment in crypto journalism. They so convinced the public that they even had members of Congress acting it out for the TV cameras. Just another silly moment for the boys and girls that we pay to be serious.

Then we had that startling crypto-story by Rolling Stone Magazine. They were able to pretty much destroy all of the fraternities at the University of Virginia. The power of crypto-journalism is astounding.

There was a day when the news profession had standards. In those days, the New York Times could claim "all the news that is fit to print", and they would be believed. Today they print all the news that fits their agenda. In the past, MSNBC would be laughed off the air. Not in these glorious times.

So, as long as crypto-journalists go to crypto-schools and get crypto-degrees, then grow up to become crypto-editors, we can expect no better.